Monday, January 25, 2010

Stranglehold: Trapped in My Depressed Mind


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I've been in an evil mood since Friday. There is no question I've been in a knock down, drag out fight with my depression for weeks now, but I seemed to be bouncing back. Then all of the sudden a switch flipped. I became incredibly irritable and angry and downright unpleasant to be around.

Saturday evening through Monday afternoon is the only good part of any week for me. That's the only time my husband is able to be at home. We get to spend the entire time together. For some reason my mind couldn't be convinced to enjoy our time together and set aside whatever was bringing me down. I hate myself for wasting our precious time together and not letting him know I appreciate him as much as I do. I've become increasingly convinced there is no way out of depression for me. I can't put in the work to improve or maintain my mood when I'm this depressed, but I can't get out of this deep level of depression without doing some work and using my tools. It feels like an impossible situation.

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DISCLAIMER: Nothing on this site constitutes medical or legal advice. I am a patient who is engaged and educated and enjoys sharing my experiences and news about migraines, pain and depression. Please consult your own health care providers for advice on your unique situation.